Sunday, April 22, 2007
10:20 AM
Music Makes Me Fuck, Laugh, Cry, Smart
Talking to Carlos, I realized that many people equate songs, albums, and artists to a specific portion of their lives.
Remembering and cherishing the very album that help lead you through that dark, scary depression. Smiling and laughing at the songs which accompanied you and your close friends through countless nights of drinking, smoking, and just being young.
Crying while listening to the album that occured before you got help for your addiction, your depression, your rebellion at our world.
Grimising or even fondly remembering the artist that you and your ex used to dance to or enjoy listening to together.
Grimising even more listening to the "lovey-dovey" songs you dedicated to that person at one time.....
Music is life, so it's natural to have "soundtracks" to different parts of your life.
But it really hit me hard when I realized that I don't have these things. Music is such a big part of my life, it's like breathing to me. I cannot distinguish one breath from another. I cannot say, "This breath reminds me of my childhood, and that breath reminds me of the time I battled my personal demons head on."
Sure, there may be one or two songs that bring up memories. Like Coolio's "Fantastic Voyage", that brings up colorful memories of cruising with my friends as we talked about our inappropriately, older boyfriends who were waiting for us in the hotel room they rented for our shin-dig that night.
El Debarge's "Who's Johnny" which reminds me of my childhood. Reminds me of the Saturday mornings my dad used to take me and my brother to run household errands like shopping and cleaning the car while my mom stayed behind to clean the house.
Individual songs bring back floods of memories for me....but not whole albums....not particular artists.....and for some reason that bothers me.
I can't even tell you the names of albums from my favorite artists. I am so fucked up that the titles of songs is all I can blurt out.
Shit, even the song-that-defines-my-life, "Breath Me" by Sia is all I can tell you about that. I have NO idea what the album is called. That's fucked up...seriously.
But, like I said; music is breathing to me. I don't need whole albums to bring me through a hard time of my life. I don't need one artist to help me have the time of my life.
Gimme all the songs you got on that there MP3 player and let's ROCK!!!!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
I'm Like A Virgin when I feel Crazy For You.
I Was Hoping 27 Jennifers would visit Pensacola in their Freetime so that I can Get Together with you.
Life sucks sometimes so Breath Me and Like It Or Not, I'll Live To Tell.
Fucking In The Bushes like Animals is just as fun as getting Rope Burn on that Velvet Rope.
I'm Fortunate there's No More Drama. Actually, I can give you One Million Reasons why that makes me Feel Good Inc.
One More Addiction, Two Step, Tres, Four Years Old, Language Lessons (Five Words Or Less), Six Feet Under Theme.....
I Never Can Say Goodbye...but Let Me Go.
*takes a bow*
Said By Nicole
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